ROTON 780-110, $93.45 from Door Closer.com best price out there, don't know about shipping. I used to buy these for $60 some $ from Mayflower Sales pre covid as a commercial account.
Or use a standard HSS drill with 5% cobalt, sets with cobalt are probably double the cost of a standard HSS set, but individual drills would be very cheap. Then it's just like drilling ferrous iron.
As much as I hate to do it, I think I'm just going to grab some smaller butt hinges, install a partial jamb on the hinge side (I've already got the piece milled up and waiting), trim the door to accommodate the extra width of the jamb, and mount it.
I suspect that none of the options will work as well as the one designed for screen doors—the one at the outset you said you did not want to use. While most are black or white powder-coated, there are a few variations that you might find less objectionable.
The risk of pursuing this as you are, is that you find something that “works”, but really just hobbles along until it fails.
At any rate, take another look and see if there is a variation that you can live with: